What BBQ Taught Me About Life

This past weekend was unseasonably warm in southwest Indiana. And, whenever it is warm, and I can find an excuse to do it, there’s good chance that I’m going to be outside putting something on my Weber Smokey Mountain. BBQ is one of my favorite hobbies.

I want to be clear about something up front here. When I say “BBQ”, I’m not talking about having a party and grilling hot dogs and hamburgers. That’s not BBQ; that’s grilling. There is a difference.

Don’t get me wrong, I love to grill as well. I have a bit of an arsenal of outdoor cooking vessels on my back patio.

I have a gas grill for those evenings after work when I want to cook up some hamburgers, chicken breasts, or pork chops.

I have a charcoal kettle grill for those days when I have a little bit more time and want to get that grill flavor — or for when I want to do a final sear over some hot coals to really capture the flavor and get a nice finish to the meat.

And then there’s the Weber Smokey Mountain (WSM). It what you might call a vertical barrel smoker. There is a level at the bottom where the charcoal and wood chunks go. Above that is a rack where I will either place a pan to catch drippings/add moisture to the chamber by pouring out a beer or some apple juice. If I have a lot to cook, that second rack ends up being used for food in addition to the top rack, which is where the food cooks 9.5 times out of 10.

My dad bought me the WSM a few years ago for my birthday. I don’t know if he was expecting a big tax refund that year, or he just wanted me to experience the joy of smoking that he had when he used his WSM.

I had been doing BBQ for a while at that point, but it was mostly in my kettle grill, and I couldn’t really do a lot at a time because of the size restrictions.

BBQ is all about the long cook. Typically, you don’t get your temperature much higher than 250–275 (though, a lot of people will say that you shouldn’t even go above 225, but that’s crazy talk to me), and, depending on the cut of meat, you can expect it to take anywhere from 3 to 10 hours.

I’ve been perfecting my BBQ through the years. I keep a notebook of almost all of my cooks so I can reference them, tweak recipes, gauge cook time, etc. I’ve also spent a lot of time thinking about BBQ and the lessons that you can learn from it that you can take with you in life.

I want to share some of those lessons with you today.

Preparation

One of the keys to making good BBQ is in the preparation. No matter what cut of meat you are working with, there is some kind of prep work that needs to be done.

With ribs, a lot of people will pull the membrane off the bottom side of the ribs. It’s a simple procedure. You just take a knife or something to get under it, grab it with a paper towel, and pull back. That will take care of most of the membrane.

It gets a little more involved with other cuts. There is a lot of trimming with a brisket; cutting out the hard fat that won’t render, cutting down the thick pieces of fat.

And then there is the rub, injection, or other means of adding some flavor to the eat (brine, marinade, etc.). It’s not as simple as just putting the meat on the smoker and moving on with life. You can do it, but the results won’t be what you want them to be.

Life is a lot like that. You can go through life, one day at a time. You can live without making plans. You can make it without having goals. You can. But you probably shouldn’t. There’s a difference between being alive and living.

You could just float through life like the leaf in Forrest Gump, but I can pretty much guarantee you that your life isn’t going to turn out like some kind of Hollywood film.

I’m not suggesting that you have to be the most ambitious person in the world either. You don’t have to set out to conquer the world every night like Pinky and the Brain. They could never pull it off anyway.

But you can have some short-term and some long-term goals. Things that give you purpose and meaning. There are all kinds of ways to make this a reality in your life. Some people will just sit down and sketch something out. Some may need to get away for a few days and really reflect on it.

Do whatever works for you, but spend some time in preparation. It makes everything work better.

The Process

Good BBQ is about figuring out a process. Finding out what works and making it repeatable, while at the same time, having the flexibility to adapt when things don’t go according to plan.

This weekend, my meat of choice was a pork butt, so I could make some pulled pork. I don’t love pulled pork, but I do enjoy it from time to time, and it is one of the easiest things to make for a large group of people.

After I prepped the pork (with an injection and a rub), I put it back in the fridge to cool down while I got the smoker going. And that’s when I discovered that I didn’t have enough charcoal to get through the entire cook.

I went ahead and started the cook, and then went to the store to get some more charcoal. Typically, I can get the smoker to the temperature I want (250–275 degrees) in about 20 minutes or so. I wasn’t too worried about it. However, when I came back from the store, it was still sitting below 200. Great if you want to do some “cold smoking”; not so great when you have 12 people coming over for dinner in 8 hours. I had to adapt.

I immediately put some more charcoal in the smoker, and lit up another chimney of coals to get the heat up right away. It still was a slow climb. An hour later, it was only at 200. I grabbed a handheld fan, and started blowing on the coals. The flames started kicking up, and it wasn’t long until it finally reached an acceptable temperature. By this point, I had lost 2 hours in what should have only been a 5–6 hour cook.

A great many things in our lives are predictable. I know that on most weeks, I’m going to be in my office getting work done Monday through Thursday. I know that on Sunday mornings, I’m going to have a certain number of things that I have to do as the morning unfolds, and by the afternoon, I’m going to be tired, but I won’t want to take a nap (with two kids, nap time is just about the only quiet time I get to myself when I’m at home).

To deal with such predictability, we develop habits, routines, ways to do things because it is efficient and easy to do. And that’s okay!

There’s nothing wrong with figuring out a process that works on a regular basis. AS LONG AS you aren’t so stuck to the process that you can’t handle it when something doesn’t go as planned.

Life has a nasty habit of throwing us curve balls from time to time. We are expecting the fastball, right down the middle is nice, but we can track it when the ball doesn’t change it’s flight pattern. But, there we are, a ball flying at our heads, we duck, and it curves right into the strike zone.

We have to be able to plan, and then adapt our plans as circumstances dictate. We cannot take into account every contingency in life. There will be unexpected twists and turns. Not only do we have to plan, but we have to be willing to be flexible enough to adapt our plans.

The Finished Product

Of course, the best part about BBQ… is eating it. There’s nothing like a perfectly cooked rack of ribs, or slice of brisket. I recall Adam Wainwright, pitcher for the St. Louis Cardinals, saying in an interview once about how bad BBQ makes him mad. Such a great piece of meat, and then somebody has to go and mess it up. I’m right there with him. Bad BBQ makes me mad… but good BBQ can stick with you for a long, long time.

I still remember a meal I had in 2014 at 12 Bones BBQ in Asheville, NC. The ribs were great, and the sides were amazing. I had a 36 oz. bone-in ribeye that had to have been reverse seared (smoked for a long time, and then finished with a sear on the grill). It still makes my mouth water… that was in 2011.

It is my contention that there is rarely any better food than good BBQ.

What does this have to do with life? Enjoy it. Sure, when things are going bad, it can really suck (that’s when we go back a step, adapt and press on).

But this is the only life you get (well, depending on your worldview, but for the sake of argument here, let’s just assume there is no reincarnation; that may be a big ask for you, but we’ll deal with it down the road).

Enjoy your life. Look for the good in others. Do good to others. Be thankful and generous. Choose to let some things slide from time to time. Prioritize what is really important, and what really lasts and brings you joy.

Conclusion

There’s a good deal more that we can learn from BBQ, but I’ll call it a day there. Let me encourage you to think on these lessons… and find (or make) some good ‘que today.